I am blundering along with my martial arts training. There's just so many drills I have to do, and apart from that I have other personal projects, hobbies, and promises to get back to that I find I am coming up short.

The feeling is like throwing all sorts of things, memories, knowledge, experiences, etc at me and seeing what sticks over a decent period of time. It's a bit overwhelming, especially since I was such a lazy child. However, I am not a kid any longer, and if I want to achieve something for myself I need to hustle.

I'm doing ball-rolling exercises right now for two hours everyday. I'm using a medicine ball on a table that's a near-replica of what my teacher has. The training has been surprisingly soothing; controlling the ball requires more attention than is apparent at first glance. I noticed the challenge is in keeping your whole hand in contact with the ball while moving it in a circle, which means letting the ball roll under your hand a little. Just the right amount of stickiness is needed - otherwise the eight-pound ball stops moving in a nice little circle and goes off to break things.

I'm also doing a number of leg drills. The idea is to work on the coordination between my upper and lower body. The ultimate goal is to rewire the body into the ideal of my particular branch of kung fu. But it feels a lot like toiling in the valley, training for a situation that I may never experience. It's not like I go around provoking fights with people; I also firmly believe in only doing what is congruent with my aims. But my teacher said that we train in this everyday, for that one moment that we will need it. That situation we'll need "it" in doesn't have to be a fight, but the point is to have this skill to enrich ourselves and to extend what we can do.