My last post about the T-ARA controversy had me thinking about why I made it. In all probability the past few months they have gone through will be as statistical noise - irrelevant compared to their career taken as a whole. In fact they seem to be recovering quickly. I suppose the only thing I accomplished in doing so was outing myself as a Queen.

(Yes, that is what they call their supporters. Queens.)

It was a pointless thing to do, but I still felt that I had to do it. I felt I needed to take a stand against the persecution as a matter of principle. There is no context where saying someone deserved to be in a car accident could ever be justified. Calling for someone to be infected with a terminal disease then raped or murdered is unconscionable.

Was the aim to teach the members a lesson? Then if they died or disappeared from the public eye, how would we know that they had learned? How could they practice "not being a bully" if we  take away their opportunity to do so? It seems like the message we're sending out with being so venomous is that some forms of bullying are fine, or perhaps that bullies should be more cunning in hiding their emotional terrorism.    

The appeal to altruism is a lie. What's been done to T-ARA is violence, pure aggression stemming from outrage. And outrage is a tricky emotion; where other emotions' causes would involve the individual in a personal way, outrage bases its trigger on the breaking of social codes that are present in the society the individual belongs to.  That means you don't have to be the wronged party to feel outrage. It also means that people can feel entitled to retaliate over things so inane as using a pot lid as a plate to eat ramen.

I suppose it derives from the sense that when someone crosses a rule they should be immediately punished. When a public figure prances about in front of us we expect him to know his place, that he is merely an entertainer subordinate to our own whims. If he stays long past our interest he becomes the target of scorn, and if he breaks a taboo then the opportunity for greater entertainment arises through his ruination. The anticipation of this greater entertainment as well as its playing out inspires deep emotions within us. For instance, when the Romans held their gladiatorial games it wasn't uncommon for women to be seized with a madness while watching the spectacle. The sight of bloodshed somehow ignited within them lusts that less scrupulous youths would take advantage of - an ancient form of date rape, if you will.

Now, people don't need to gather in amphitheatres; they have the equivalent of perpetual front-row seats. They are close enough to see all the gore and fallout, while at the same time they retain their anonymity and distance so they don't feel guilty over what others have to go through. 

Who gave us the authority, the right to be judge and jury? What qualifies us to be the enforcer of society's rules? I find no comfort in the fact that 50 years ago we were enforcing a completely different set of norms, or that we just need to change countries to find the same set of rules invalidated. 

I feel for every Tablo, Lindy Chamberlain, or Christine Collins out there. I feel for Park So Yeon, Jeon Boram, Ham Eun-jeong, Park Sun-young, Park Ji-yeon, and Ryu Hwa-young.    

알고 있는 팬들만

I have a problem.

There is a group out there I really like, they can be easily identified if I mentioned their initials.  They seem to be very different from the usual celebrities that I get to know of. They've been doing quite well, except that they got into quite a nasty situation this year. It's become quite a big deal, and they are really having to endure a lot of pain as a result.

I don't really know them; all I know I got from reading things on the Internet or watching their appearances. I've never worked with them or talked to them or even met them. But their being around has made me smile and laugh more often than usual. I cringe inside when I see them having to go through awkward situations. My outlook in life has been a little bit brighter because of them, even though the obstacles I have to face are still as heavy and dark as ever.

Everyone wants answers on what truly happened with one of their members. People are feeling betrayed. But what I feel is gratitude, for what they have done for me so far. It's amazing, how they have the power to inspire someone from so far away. To someone who does not smile much at all, every barely-suppressed grin is a treasure. They have improved the texture of my life.

 I would like it if their persecution would stop. They are dedicated women, very strong and chasing after such a big dream. In no time at all the dream may end on its own, and I'd like it if the quality of their memories of this time would be as unblemished as possible. Continuing on punishing them like this is like polluting a river - everyone doesn't care that everybody else is doing the same thing, and so what was once a clean waterway soon becomes stagnant and dirty.

They're people. They fail to measure up too, sometimes. But they have dreams and people to support and loved ones who are affected when they are crucified by a few lines of text or a few minutes of video that have been taken the wrong way. If we take their livelihood away from them, it is not just them who will be inconvenienced. They're people - they couldn't have known what would happen to one of their own or what effect their words would have. Putting them on such high pedestals just makes them more liable to fall.  

My problem is that I have no power to act on this feeling. I am alone while the ones doing the hating are many. I am anonymous, but so are they. They are acting on what they hope for the most, and they are acting with such energy that I could never match them. I have no money or connections or skills that could be put to use. Indeed, I feel that no matter what I do right now the pain they will have to face won't be lessened by much.

But I've decided to live with that painful knowledge and do what I can. Though my best may not achieve my goal, doing so at least brings me a bit closer (hopefully). And perhaps my feelings will carry over, and like the magic that touched me one weekend the world could be made right again for them.